i'm back at work. had a very exciting week off to see the city in which i know reside. up over my head with video work to get done before sunday. the following is a Valley of Vision compilation prayer that i put together for one of my videos. i'll post them once they are finished. hopefully this encourages someone out there. it encouraged me big time.
"Sin is my malady, my monster,
my foe,
my viper,
born in my birth, alive in my life,
strong in my character,
dominating my faculties,
following me as a shadow,
intermingling with my every thought,
my chain that holds me captive in the empire of my soul.
Blessed Lord Jesus,
Before thy cross I kneel and see the heinousness of my sin,
my iniquity that caused thee to be 'made a curse',
the evil that excites the severity of divine wrath.
Thy blood is the blood of the incarnate God,
it's worth infinite,
its value beyond all thought,
Infinite must be the evil and the guilt that demands such a price.
The memory of my great sins,
my many temptations,
my falls,
bring afresh into my mind the remembrance of thy great help,
of thy support from heaven,
of the great grace that saved such a wretch as I am.
There is no treasure so wonderful as that continuous experience of thy grace toward me which alone can subdue the risings of sin within."

jOSH:?

[photo credit:Beth

So I am thinking I might have made a not so good reputation for myself with my last post. That is not a typical day at the office. It was a one time thing.....
Today was pretty chaotic. I realized that trying to do admin type stuff is pretty hard. I was building a survey for the worship team, something that they can answer and then I can plug their answers into a spreadsheet and spit out a schedule. It is a good idea. The program was nuts though. And I was a bit brainless to on a couple of questions. So basically it made for a full day of survey junk. In which I was having many heart issues. I was complaining, I was angry, I was trusting in my own strength, it was terrible. By 12:30pm I needed to leave to get food in me and to read my bible. Thanks to the words of a friend I decided to open up Romans 1. The things that God began to do in my heart were powerful. I was reading about the wrath of God being revealed against all ungodliness. I was seeing my ungodliness. I was seeing myself so strongly in this passage. Scary. I saw how sinful I was being regarding a stupid survey. I felt sorta sick, I think it was the combination of the whopper and the conviction of sin. Oh but what would the book of Romans be without chapter 3? Inspite of my sin "a righteousness from God has been made known" / Then I flipped to Isaiah to see what my saviour endured for my sin. How God had to crush Him for me, the one who complains in the midst of an ocean of grace and mercy, and I was finally broken. I just walked to the park behind the office and shed tears, I don't know if they were all tears of repentance but also of Joy. The old old story is a joyful story.
I went back to that survey with a heart that had been freshly washed clean. I heart that had repented and been reminded of the grace in which I live.

p.s. Eric says I am the master of survey monkey and he is willing to outsource my work for a small fee.

Okay, I'll admitt to this one thing, interns do have short attention spans sometimes, they require quite a bit of water and food, and THEY DO NOT DO WELL WHEN LEFT ALONE...........That is precisely what happened to me the other day. Josh, all alone in the office for three and a half hours....... By the time the fourth hour was rolling round I determined I could take no more and I needed to work on my skills. Which produced this extremely rough short film. enjoi

Well, I have been experiencing what I refer to as the "not-saying-no-and-staying-out-too-late" sickness. I get sick when I get tired. I get tired when I don't go to bed at a decent time. I don't go to bed at a decent time because I don't say "no" enough.
I love to hang out with friends and I have been able to build some great friendships already, but I also work 8-5 everyday. I find I often fall into that trap of trying to please people. I would venture to say that it is FEAR OF MAN; the fear of saying 'no' when we have good reason too. I want to grow in being wise. I want to know when it's fine to go and enjoy a movie and when its just foolish. Even youths grow faint; I find myself growing faint of late. I want to seek after wisdom, I want to be wise beyond my years. 19 year olds don't have to be foolish, they don't have to stay out late every night. There is a place for having fun. There is a place for staying out late with friends. But there is also a time, and that is what I am seeking to grow in, and haven't really figured out yet. Thankfully verses like these are so true, God is so faithful and steadfast even when I am weak and unstable....
"Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. " ISAIAH 40:28-31

wow. my first 14 hour day. not much else to say right now. i am tired. but i am sure eric T. is more tired than me. try staying up all night after a 14 hour day studying Hebrew. good luck eric. props to carissa for the photo.

first lunch appointment today. something about just going out for lunch with someone as part of your job is cool. especially when you don't have to pay. God has been humbling me since i have been here. it seems that i am forgetting to bring my wallet with me an awful lot. so it gets to the point where i am just about to admit how much of a loser i am and how i forgot my wallet and then the person (whoever i'm out with) pays for me before i have to ask. just a small way that i am aware that God is taking care of me. just a small thing to help me realize how dependant i am on him for every morsel of food that i get to eat. for every breath that i take. for every landscape that i get to see. he makes it all happen. i just enjoy it.

J:C:S

one thing about being an intern that i am already noticing is that you get to learn a lot in condensed periods of time. for example, i have been forced to learn how to plan. i never planned anything in the past. my dad worked hard on me and i can definitely see the effects of all that hard work coming out but otherwise i never scheduled a single event in my life. now, everything that i do is done based on a calender or else i am dead. if i don't plan i die. that is not to leave out the grace of God though. he is gracious and often helps me squeak through on things, but i think that is mostly to remind me that apart from a schedule (or plan) and a constant dependance on him, i won't get anything done. it is that simple.
another thing that i have been noticing is that i get to wake up and go and get taught how to do stuff by a bunch of pastors. (haha. it's sad that i just noticed that after five days) they often just give me small thoughts but they are helpful small thoughts. if somehow i could take every small thought and put it to practice i would be a pretty amazing guy. unfortunately i can't. so i'll continue to be a sinner who is slowly learning to depend more and more on the holy spirit for that change, and i'll do as much as i can with his help. all i have to do is ask with a heart of faith. check this out: "If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!”LUKE 11:13

For the people that do not yet know me, my name is Josh Sczebel, I am 19 years old and am interning here at Grace Church in San Diego, California. I was born in Kamloops, BC, (that is in Canada) so I definitely feel a little bit out of place down here in Southern California.........but not too out of place; mostly because for the last 8 years I have been living in Vancouver, BC which has many similarities to San Diego. So that is a tiny bit of background on me, now I will explain a bit about how I ended up here and what I am here to do. Back in March of this year my Dad, Pat Sczebel, had the opportunity to go to the Together for the Gospel Conference with Tony Walsh who is the senior pastor at my home church Crossway Community. At the end of the conference he (my dad) began a dialogue with Eric Turbedsky regarding Grace Church's desire to have an intern come and serve in the areas of media and worship. My dad responded by saying, "that sounds like my son." They discussed this possibility for the next few weeks and my dad also sought out counsel from other Sovereign Grace pastors in trying to discern whether or not this was the position for me. When I first heard about the possibility my initial response was, "what about all my plans?" haha. I had a great job, was serving in many ways in my local church and was just happy where I was. On top of all of that I was planning on starting a Joinery apprenticeship program at a local trades school in Vancouver. I have to admit that the idea of southern California was definitely appealing to me. But at first I just didn't really have the faith to say yes right off the top. So I began to pray about it and seek out counsel from close friends and others who I figured would have a better grasp on things than I did. Whenever I would talk to people and get their counsel they would listen to me and just sorta stare, after a while of this they would usually respond with something like, "Heck Yes you should do it!" (sorry, i couldn't resist the nd quote). The more I prayed and talked, the more it seemed clear to me that this was God's plan for me. So my dad and I arranged a phone call with Eric and we told him that I was up for the adventure. A few months and 7 lightyears of emails later (inside joke) the adventure began. We left on August 22 around 9:00 pm Pacific time. My dad, brother Joel, and I departed to make the long drive down to SD. Aside from a few car troubles we had a relatively care-free car ride down. We arrived thursday August 24 just after 8:00pm. And thus began my San Diego trip. Today will end the first four days that I have had in the office. In which I have for the most part just been getting settled in. Buying computer gear, camera gear, wiping hard drives, installing software, going to burger king, recieving cameras, computer gear, etc. I don't really know why a crazy canadian like me gets to do something as cool as this. God is extremely gracious. He does not treat us as our sins deserve! That is an incredible truth that doesn't ever get old to me. Looking forward to the next ten months.

:J:C:S: